Raising kids can be one of the biggest jobs many of us will ever face in life. Sometimes we are blessed with an only child, and he or she is blessed in return with lots of attention. However, many people choose to have more than one child, and when other little ones come into the picture, the amount of attention the oldest once got may decrease. Parents must focus on enforcing sharing whether they have one child or many to help their kids get along a little more easily in the world.
The concept of ownership is a normal developmental milestone, which means that for little ones it can be tough to share. Around two, toddlers often realize that they can own things, and they may even develop strong attachments to specific items, such as a bear or a blanket. Expecting a two-year-old child to share may just set you and the child up for frustration and failure. However, with the right guidance, healthy models of behavior and plenty of positive encouragement, even small children can learn the value of cooperation, generosity and sharing.
Although it may seem counterintuitive, respect your child’s right to his or her own property to set the groundwork for positive sharing. A toddler should not be forced to share a treasured doll or truck any more than you should have to share a piece of heirloom jewelry or your grandmother’s precious china. Still, you can work with your child to find toys and belongings that he or she is willing to share. Talking to your child before social interaction about expectations and empathy can help prepare him or her to share other belongings. Before the play-date, put away those items that are too valuable for your child to want to share to reduce temptation to other children, and focus on supplying plenty of community toys that everyone can enjoy. You may also invite your child’s friend to bring over some of his or her own toys to share.
During playtime, make sure attention is high, and watch the children closely. Encourage taking turns and discourage children from grabbing items from one another’s hands. Use a timer so that children learn to wait patiently for their turn. Play games that encourage sharing. Give one child a basket of snack food to distribute to the other children or a bucket of blocks to share. He or she will learn that sharing is not about losing or missing out on something but can instead be a way to share the joys and pleasures in life.
Although it can be embarrassing when child throws a fit or refuses to share, do not rush in to interfere right away. Give the children time and space to work it out first.